MynameisGome

All I Know I Learned From ME

2010-07-14T09:01:00.000-07:00

Growing up in the 40's led to a strange childhood. My Dad left to go to war and i hardly ever saw him until i was 7 .He was the person in the middle of the night that came in , wearing olive drab clothing, and caused me to be moved from my Mamas bed to my own..We children of that time, wore dog tags to school with our name, blood type and our Dads name and rank on them, learned about blackouts, ducking into a hallway in case an atom bomb was dropped(?)and doing without some staples because they were needed for the war. So we played war in the neighborhood, tramped through woods and creeks..seriously, we stayed outside all the time. From early to dark and ran across everything you can imagine from snakes, spiders, poision ivy, anything and everything that moved or didn't move we learned about. We climbed trees, carved our names into tree trunks with little knives (yep, real ones) played in the dirt with our cars, made roads, had mudball fights (you were out if you put a rock in the middle of your mudball) and pine cone fights..those hurt....hide and seek, tag, free for all(in this a huge pile of kids just jumped on each other and I was always on the bottom) and King of the red mud Hill...(ha, our parents didn't like this one because no one had washing machines back then)we owned animals, found animals, brought home animals and always wondered where our prizes of turtles, frogs, and lizzards went. I was such a tom boy and life was so simple. My mother wondered if I would ever get sissified, she even asked my Daddy sdoctor(back then they came to the house for you) asked, in front of me because I was hanging by my knees from a tree in the front yard..he told her not to worry I would change in time enough..sure enough when i became a "woman" in the 7th grade, I changed..I loved reading, drawing, and horses..had a boyfriend who walked me home, carrying my books and we rode bikes together all over the neighborhood..you could ride back then everywhere and still be safe, caught fireflies at night, went to the neighborhood swimming pool and walked , Yes, In the woods.... Still , changes had to come, tv came to our house, black and white and a roundish screen, and we got to watch Bonanza and Ed Sullivan. My parents expected me to do good in school..it was a given, you do good all a's ..no questions..they didn't praise me..teachers did and other people..but they just expected it. I visited my aunts and uncles and grandmother in the summers..stayed most all summer. My grandmother lived in Springfield, SC and it was a big ol wood house with tin roof..she had the best stuff to play with, an old upright piano, pigs, chickens, cow, mule, huntin dogs, a windmill and a puddle of cold water always under the windmill...broken pottery and maypops, toothpicks, sticks, corn dolls and even a stick doll my friend made me. She had black women that helped her put up vegetables and peaches and they were my best friends. "Duck" taught me how to fish, "ol essie" made me the stick doll and I got a pickled pigs foot to have as a treat....there were NO all day suckers, so I was probably about 5 or 6 and carried the pig foot all day long, just puttin it down on the back steps long enough to eat dinner(lunch now) and didn't even question anything they gave me to eat. If we had "brains and eggs" for breakfast, I ate and didn't even ask.."whose brains?" Man, I can remember one Christmas at her house, it was soo cold and the only heat was from little fireplaces in each room..so we all ran to the kitchen to dress in the mornings where the wood stove was...freezin my feet off....we had a cut out of the woods cedar tree and I made a paper chain for the tree..it was War Time and people did what they could. my grandmother had one son left at home and he was at war as was my daddy and other uncles..so all the women came home and helped out. When the war was over and my Daddy home for good, we got more things and even got a new 1950 car. Never lost my love of drawing, reading or horses . Times got more complicated and harder and i always wondered why it didn't get easier as you got older. But my Aunt, when she was 84, told me "You got to get tough" otherwise you won't make it.

Who the hell wants to get tougher and tougher just to make it...by that time you just feel forgotten, unloved, alone, and distanced from all that use to matter..Life Sucks

SPRING 2010

2010-03-27T15:54:00.000-07:00

This is a milestone for me. In April I will turn 70. I keep up with a lot of my classmates who will also turn 70 all this year..they look good and active, they tell me i look good too but I wonder. I am doing ok with the aches and pains i have acquired due to very hard work for 35 years. I don't think I want to see them and I am kinda glad I have not been to any of the reunions. Some of them i envy and some i feel comfortable with. Maybe it is taking a good look at all the successes and failures you have accomplished since you graduated in 1958...phew, who knew that we would be going through all that we have. All the changes and all the inventions and all the social, economic and personal trials and walking on fire that we endured. We use to be called the greatest generation. Now I think it is the forgotten generation.. how many of us have outlived our money and our usefulness.??? huh? you think we don't think about that when the month is longer than our income? When the bills come due and you know you are going to have to put those extra medical and tax and dentist and presents bills on your charge card that is already maxed out? Yes, we all do. And it is so bad that sometimes you wish you had Dr. Kervorkians number. Most days are good and happy and fantastic, you can find things to do, people to help, be there for someone..but who is there for you? Really? and it can come over you like a ton of bricks and you find yourself overwhelmed, totally destroyed, fighting the sadness and despair that is like a ton of bricks dumped over your head. You can't fight it, so you let it cover you, take you, let the feelings happen and then shake it off and continue, still wondering what the hell you are here for. Last year my birthday passed quietly, no cards to flowers. My son called but we didn't get to go eat until later that week. So , we feel forgotten, disposable, not useful for anyting anymore and ready to give up...what is there? No one cares, no one calls, no one send cards , everyone is too busy and challenged with their own business. Don't work so hard, Happy Spring..my birthday is April 19, 2010 and I will be 70.

Icy cold Jan and Feb 2010

2010-02-08T05:52:00.000-08:00

I admire the women of today..a lot. They have the ability to express themselves through work, home, play, on the internet, write for a publication, meet technology and embrace it completely. I was a product of the" greatest generation" where women were squeezed into a mold that didn't exactly fit. I watched my mother, aunts and grandmother supress their opinions (except when they got together), blend into the background, take second place to the men, and rule the household without letting anyone know they were the actual ruler. Come high school and i got a slightly skewed view of the world and walked slightly on the left of center. I questioned, broke some rules, got sent to detention, was chewed out by our counselor (again the women walk behind rule), and was so excited to graduate I was the only one happy and laughing admist the sea of sobs..I went to college only to find out the bonds were deep and hard to break from. Your choices were secretary, nurse, or teacher..none of which appealed to me. So when i got married at 21, the mold was almost set. It was stay home, cook, clean, keep the kid clean, go to the beauty parlor once a week, be quiet and i couldn't do it. I was stiffled and felt like i was in a prison. I would rather cut grass than clean house, wash my car instead of cook supper..gosh, i was insane! I think my mother and my aunts were the same, but their pholosphy was, be the leader but be quiet about it! As soon as i got pregnate, i quit work because everyone told me too..now it was 1963 and from work at the state house in Atlanta i could see the marchers on the civil rights marches..they were brave.
I must have packed up and left my household 4 or 5 times, running where, i didn't know..i even packed my wigs one time! My mother told me i couldn;t come home so i always went back because a single woman just didn't check into a motel..and my stepford friends thought i was crazy! I had already stepped to the left of center at the university. I dated a young man from Iran, and we had a good time..until the dorm "Mom" called me in and discussed the improprity of dating outsie my "religion" wha??????????? when my first husband and i started a small business together in 1970, again my place was the grunt work in the background and following ..when my second husband and i opened a business again, i took my place(?) my salary was less even though i worked more, my hours were longer but i got paid just enough to pay the bills and buy food..it got so bad that when i wanted to go to the first mall that opened in town, my second husband would take me and come pick me up to see what i had bought!!damn, my rebellion then consisted of taking a cab home one time, putting up my things that i had bought and then taking a cab back to work..hahahahaha , i got repreminded..of course. But the arrangement did a horrible thing to my self esteme and i got uncertain and unsure. plus the fact that i made less, a lot less than the boss , even tho' i was vice president and my ideas were the better and made more sense..again that mold just didn;t fit me..never had, never would. That came to hurt me in many many ways after we divorced..my lawyer told to (and he wrote it down to the other attorney) that my salary was to be equal and i was to have access to all the books and finiancial transactions going on.and i felt for the first time, really liberated and equal. The divorce did what my rebellion could not do: It Freed Me", i took classes i had always wanted to take, took family on vacations i had always wanted to do, changed things at work to suit me and my ideas all of a sudden were good ones and taken into consideration and some were actually implemented..but it took until 1990 for that to happen. I also bought the kind of furniture that i liked, the clothes that i liked ,the car i wanted, ate the food i wanted to (without someone lurking and asking me "if i really wanted to order that or if i really was going to wear that ) there is a very real danger in passive agression and it causes one to strike back hurtfully because you are not aware all the time that someone is demeaning you or clawing at your selfesteem until you feel everything you do is wrong. It hurt badly at my age of retirement because your salary determines what you get in soc. sec. so for years, being in the background, taking less money and sometimes no money when the business did poorly, hurt my ability to fend for myself at retirement..i wasn't able to save as much and put aside as much and i make the dire mistake of loaning my business, Bums Factory Outlet, over 60,000 which i would never recoup. So yes, I do admire the women of today for their guts, for asking for what they are worth and for demanding respect in business and at home, because for so many for so long the respect wasn't there for us. Go Women, Run With the Wolves.......

Santa and Christmas

2009-12-20T07:42:00.000-08:00

I don't remember ever seeing so many santas as there are now. They are everywhere you look and the insistent advertising of stuff follows them like gnats on a sweaty horse. I don't have a picture of me with santa. And only a couple of santa and my son. Of course, I was born in 1940 and for the first 6 or 7 years of my life, WW2 influenced every aspect of my being. Christmas was very simple. I would get one big thing , some pajamas and a few clothes. Mostly we gave each other (My aunts, uncles, grandma, mom, daddy) pajamas or robes. Evidentally we wore them out a lot! I got one thing from santa and a couple little things and stocking with fruit, hard candy and thats about it. I can remember one Christmas at my grandmothers where the tree was a pine and i helped make a paper chain for part of the decorations. It was so cold because the only heat source was a little fuel heater in my grandmas bedroom, the others had those little fireplaces that took coal and a large fireplace in the dining room for big logs and the wood stove in the kitchen! Wow, when i woke up after sleeping under about 4 quilts, i ran to the kitchen and dressed by the wood stove. Needless to say, we took very few baths, only sponging off with water heated on the stove and carried to the bathroom, which had only been added about 1941. So , still, Christmas came to all of us during this time, with more necessities than wants. I always got a book for Christmas and to this day, love to read. Starting out with little Mother Goose books and moving up to the classics like Black Beauty, The Black Stallion, then on to the Nancy Drew stories. I loved horses from the get go and any book about them i got. To this day, I love the smell of a library and the feel of the books. I tended to be a tom boy and wanted more things like a lionel train and a cowgirl outfit and matching guns..which i got. One Christmas , a misguided santa tried to give me a baby doll and carriage..i promptly tried to flush said babydoll down the toiled and cracked his head...huh, from then on, it was proudly displayed on the mantle every New Years Eve with a sash on that gave the new year, cracked head and all! We got things we needed mostly from then on, even when i was a young teen, maybe some roller skates and some paints and color pencils because I loved to draw, horses. But school clothes and my buster brown oxfords were the norm. I remember the first big teen thing I got was a little bulover watch from Sears and i was really proud of that watch. We had no shopping malls or big places to shop, the Sears was a bus, then trolly ride from the house and it was pretty big but did a moster job in mail order..my first bike came from there, a JC Higgins bike, too big but thats what you got, and my daddy put blocks on the pedals so I could reach. Still, there was a lot of falling, scraped knees, crying and sniggling behind my back by my mother! So maybe we have too many santas and not enough books given , now its video games, phones, computer stuff. Kids no longer want to enjoy the long books that give you the imagination to believe you are in the story yourself. After all, i read Gone With the Wind when I was 13 and could still enjoy the read. What do you think folks? Too much hype, not enough going to gather pinecones for the tree?

Maybe.

Fall is a coming

2009-09-24T10:21:00.000-07:00

Lets hope it does come a little soon or we might have more critters like this one hanging around. What a beauty of a spider. But the bugs have been really bad this year from gnats to roaches to mosquitoes and all of em! So fall is change . Again. People move, come back, change. There is some hard enough times in the economy but our President seems to be determined to make our lives more confused. Not many understand what he wants to do or how he wants to pay for all the "Change" I think if we knew more and could hear it put more simply we would not be so fearful and thats what it is, people are afraid; afraid of change and teriffied that what happend last sept will happen again. That we will lose all our savings and more and more will lose jobs and more and more homes will be lost. i don't think the current govt. has done enough to explain the reasons behind what they did or what they are going to do and uncertainty breeds distrust. I know folks are changing the way they spend, the way they shop and what becomes real NEED versus just WANT. Sure, there are things I want, would love to have...oh, maybe a 40 inch HDTV, and some new living room furniture(mine is about 15 years old or more)or a screen in porch instead of a deck, some yard work, maybe even a newer used car, but its not a need and whereas i love to watch football and movies and read, i can do that in the stuff i have got. But what i always will need is food, utilities, paying bills and some wine!! So we make do with what we have and keep hoping we hear and see more positive things coming our way. So for Christmas, just give me some Zinfadel, a book to read, some firelogs, and a box of toile paper, paper towels and cat food!! Thanks all....hurry fall.

Love Anyway

2009-09-11T11:51:00.001-07:00

Love Anyway. I want to love someone. Everyone wants to love someone. To have someone to care about, to hug, to love, to hold to sleep deeply with and to have them care for you. For them to care when you hurt and how you hurt and if they can do something to ease that pain for you. Someone there in the night, when the dreams are bad and the night is so long. To love someone and know they are thinking about you as you are them and when they can see you again and how much longer till the day is done and you are together again. To argue with, to not see eye to eye but to still care enough to call to see how you are during the work day or when you are apart. Love often, over and over and over. it does not matter the times you get hurt or the times your love is not returned equally. Just love and one of those times, you will love and it will be the same and you won't get hurt and all the other times won't matter. All that matters is just this one time, the one that didn't hurt, the one that matched perfectly. Don't be afraid to love, you will make a difference in your loving, even if it wasn't right all those other times and you will make a difference in the lives of others. Its fall and the Sept. heat and the leaves have started to turn, and the football season is upon us again and times are still tough for people with and without jobs and its hard to make the ends meet again, but we are people with hope and even the friends and neighbors and family who invite you to supper or bring you leftovers are there to cherish and the ones who are having a tough time, you be there for them and it will benefit you too. We always wish we could do more but what we do really matters.

Happy Allergy Time People

2009-03-19T16:14:00.000-07:00

It finally is Spring, along with allergies, sneezing, coughing, pollen and itching..but at least its warmer and the weather is beautiful. The furry critters are out and about and you cant see her but Lucy is down at the bottom of the tree just daring that furry tail rat to come on down. Every one is doing good and my gran in NEESES has a couple more horses and they are pretty. My little gran here is doing great at school and almost finished with the 5th grade. How proud I am of both of them. Im good, but broke, thanks to the greed of Wall st. and the banks and the crap going on in the new administration...its crazy and no one seems to know what the heck is happening.

Hope we didn't get ourselves into something really, really bad. Its just strange the way higher up people and companies just don't pay their taxes and lie about it. Well, on to raking yards for a couple bucks, except now they are all done and we are just waiting for the grass to come in.....love the smell of grass....watch out for April fool!

2009-02-26T07:32:00.000-08:00

Gosh, what can I say? Its already almost March of 09, and we have had Christmas, New Years, and the Feb. Birthdays. Its going to be a rough ride this year with the economy doing so poorly and people losing their jobs. Even the "wal mart greeter" jobs have about 100 people for each opening. You have to contend with laid off executives along with college grads for every job and moms out of work and dads getting laid off. Stretching money gets harder and harder with every month. People are losing their homes and cars and the new President has one heck of a job trying to fix this. Seniors have a really hard time because they are on fixed income...meaning..no more comes in, but more goes out...we feel sorta stuck and forgotten. This country has been through tough times before and I lived throug some of them, but this has everyone down and depressed. Time is the only thing we have going for everything put into place to start to work but its hard being patient. I am so thankful for the small bit I have and the family that I have. i have come to be so much closer to my gran in Orangeburg and her family and now she is taking horses in to train and ride and I am so proud of her. She has 4 and works with them all the time. my little gran turned 12 and she is so busy with her friends and school and skating that i seldom get to see her , Ijust hope she thinks of me once in a while. the neighborhood misses Lane and Jill and the cookouts we use to have. We had a small one last night and it was fun and good food...Mandy is the grillmaster now and she did the cooking. She is working on the pool to get it ready and on her back porch. The porch looks great, more like a room with some corner curtains and a new little rug and she is getting some cushion covers in a great stripe. .saw Rebecca for the first time in a while, she has a new guy and we NEVER see them come out for air! They are so in love and goofy.

Holly turned 4 and Matti 8 and thats about all the news...and the good times will come back...after all, Tippy got her burn barrell so she is set for the burning and is working hard on her back yard! I have nothing to give anyone after the crashing of the stock mkt last fall, all i have is me and my love. Good times will be simpler times and vegetables cooked on the grill!! Later, Dudes

SANTA CAME TO THE CIRCLE

2008-12-12T05:49:00.000-08:00

Santa finally came to the circle and he was mobbed by the kids..we must have had about 15 of the little critters. It was fun and we had good food and a couple of new babies for the day.

Kiddies ran around, played, fought, fussed, laughed and had a great time ..then it rained and it all ended. I got to go eat with my oldest grandaughter and her hubby and her mom and that was nice. I get tired of my "so called" cooking ! Cooking for me is mirowaving a dinner. However, the leftovers in the neighborhood sometimes make their way to my house and thats a good change! Hope everthing is wonderful for everyone this Christmas and maybe the New Year will be better for all. I really hope so. Look forward to the New year and miss the old ones at the same time.

December is here

2008-12-02T06:13:00.000-08:00

December is here again and this year feels different and everyone has changed some. More people are out of work and more people have lost money in the savings and retirement funds they have. Its turning out to be a Christmas of essentials like giving coffee, a gift card to a grocery store, fruit, and clothing. Not a Christmas for just things you "want" but things you need. I would be glad for a 6 pack of paper towels, some tp, coffee, and a stocking with oranges, apples and nuts in it...IF I still believed in Santa Clause. Its almost like the 50's again when you got a pair of pymas, some bedoom shoes, socks, and underwear and maybe thats what it has to be. This will pass and the economy will come back, but darn it, I have been through too many of these and now, at 69, to be worrying how to pay the water or electric bill is really depressing. All through the 40's we scrimped and had ration tickets for gas and women gave up their nylons for the war..then in the 50's, the Korean war and then was VietNam, and in the 70's the recession where we had gas rationing and you had to buy gas according to the first letter of your last name and the malls and businesses went dark at night, lights in manufacturing plants were turned off and Christmas lights were not put up because of the energy crisis..and then in the 80's another backward slide and you had to go through a shortage of goods in the stores and places were doing badly in business ....but this is worse because we had such a long run of good times where GREED raised its ugly head and screwed everything up from Wall Street, Govt, to the builder in the housing business. But we all are paying for it. i remember when we were doing good at the store and i could help family and friends and my Aunt. i put a new roof on her house, got her a new furnace, could get her any food she needed and clothing and even paid for her paper and her cable so she could watch Braves Baseball....what happend to grown children who take care of their parents? They are having hard times too and parents are having to help them and try to take care of themselves. i can't do it any more. its too hard. i don't have any resources left and the part time jobs i have applied for have not come through.

Talk about feeling alone and deserted..damn, where is everyone? Even our neighborhood is looking sad and depressed, people are not decorating as much, houses that are vacant are dark and lonely looking...God help us get through this. If even we needed the Christ put back in Christmas, its this year.

Strange Times

2008-11-22T05:25:00.001-08:00

This is a strange fall, its been colder than normal, but the trees and leaves and foliage has been beautiful. A lot of it too....we have some turbulant times in the stock market and with wall street thats affecting all the world and the retail world and consumers very badly. People can't afford to shop, their house s are being foreclosed on, even with the deep discounts you can't buy because you have either been laid off, or can't find work, or the places you use to work are closed. Its seems like someone somewhere his trying to level the playing field for the whole world. You have the big 3 auto makers coming to congress and asking for money to survive, and yet they come is corporate jets...??.whats wit tha? They want money but they pay wages that add up to 75.00 an hour and here in the south , our auto workers are doing fine, making payroll, and putting out cars for 45.00 an hour???Someone somewhere has got to get real. Maybe we do need a big ol crash, go back to living in black and white, getting up from our seats to change the channel and use a push button phone for all our communications....we are spoiled and not living within our means and it s coming back to haunt us! Change is coming and mayb not the good kind...go back to what is NEEDED not what is WANTED.....me, i just want to see my family more. I think about them a lot and them laughing, talking, playing games, talking pictures, and being and having fun. I don't go anywhere anymore unless I am invited. i don't feel right just poppping in and i love them so much. There were some horrible things said...it will come back in spades and the karma will be satisfied. So, whatever, stay warm.....had a great visit with my oldest gran and her husband. I am sorry now none of us went to her wedding. Karma...will slap you in the face, then circle around and bite you in the ass!! Stay warm, say a prayer for family , friends, and the troops..

Hard Times for 08,09

2008-10-28T10:23:00.000-07:00

The picture was taken in front of my business called Bums. I had this retail store for nearly 30 years and eventually added a wholesale section and another retail store called Catalog Factory Outlet. It was a long hard , hard, road working in your own business and I would never do it again ever. Especially now that the government is going to be taking most of what small business makes. This is not the time for venture or adventure. Thos of you who are working for a large company, the city, county or state or govt. be sure and keep what you got because the job market sucks now. That business I had went through some really rough times and some good times. It gave jobs to high school seniors in their first try at working, college kids needing their 200 hours to graduate, single moms with kids, and retired people who needed to work to keep going. We treated them with respect and taught them everything we could from cleaning, straingtening, putting up clothes and pricing and closing and opening and balancing out the register. Some were great, most were good , some were awful and stole from us. But they knew if they had a sick kid, we understood, if they needed time off, they could have it , and whatever else we could do for them from giving discounty to them and their family and even loaning a buck or two. We bought lunches, had birthday parties, Thanksgiving turkeys and Christmas hams, we gave gifts and bonusus at Christmas and tried to accomodate the football schedule.

We worked 7 days a week, sometimes from 7 am to 9 pm and sat and sun. WE never asked anything of an employee that we would not do ourselves. We hired people based on what we saw in them and not what was in their past and we were rewarded in our trust. We worked hard and in the years we did especially well, our employees benefited also. In the years that really sucked, I went many months withous pay to pay them and the rent and the bills. Many , many times I covered bills and payroll out of my own pocket and it shows in the amount of soc sec i get now. Though it was hard, so hard, it was also great fun and happiness. They were family and on big saturdays, we took everyone out to eat for a reward. I would not be able to do that again in this economy and now it is taking a great toll on me. For years, I saved a little bit now and then and tried my best to help my family when i could. Now, the stock market has managed to crash and take almost all i have saved in my IRA and retirements funds. i don't know what the future will hold or if I will be able to make a house payment and a car payment or have to choose between ...the housing market sucks so much, its not a good time to sell, and the move again would kill me...i will be 69 next year and i am tired. i have been for quite a while, just tired of trying to make ends meet and it would be nice to be cared for but i have been caring and looked after so many for so long, I just have only one way to go, put my trust in The Lord and pray.

Almost Fall!

2008-10-11T09:21:00.001-07:00

Hey, its a little cooler and the trees are showing a bit of color. It has been rough the last few weeks with my family moved a little further away. I still catch myself looking across the street and checking to make sure they are in at night, but its getting better. I really miss my Logan but she is in 6th grade now and her time is limited. i know she knows that I am here for her and would be at her side in a heartbeat if she needed me. Maybe she will get some time to call every now and then. But she is 11 , going on 25 and an old grandmother is not so much fun anymore as boys, school, friends, music, The jonas brothers, and new cell phones!! Miss my kids. Some things have been said in anger and some in honesty that will be hard to overcome. i have been accused of things that never happened and misjudged and my best friends here in the neighborhood know that its not so. One of my friends here has been hurt badly and we will miss the friendships and closeness that once was. Lane is very much missed and Logan and the family get togethers we use to have. But maybe the hurts will ease and the slights will be forgotten and even if things are never as they once were, some tension will be gone and we can at least talk for a spell. Hope so. Finiances are horrible with the stock market and i worry that our way of life as we once knew it, is gone forever. Don't know what will have to our United States and the state of our finiancial status all the way from the top to the bottom. I know that i have lost a lot of money in my retirement funds and have no idea what the future holds, if I will be able to stay in my home or look for a section 8 apartment somewhere, just worry all the time and have already cut back on services, and anything i can think of...never go anywhere or spend any extra..just don't have the income that once was. Lets pray that the right man wins and that the economy can get back on track so we all won't lose what we have.!!! Thank goodness for wine and football!!

Fall brings Change

2008-09-02T13:02:00.001-07:00

Oh no, the day has finally come when my little family of 3 plus 3 critters is moving. Its sad but glad for them. They are getting a great house and a pool but they will be missed in this neighborhood. Especially by me. I will have to get use to walking without Ellie and that will involve walking and for gosh sakes, not talking to myself...it was ok when i had the dog, people knew i was talking to her..but now...the people in little white coats will come for me...hahaha. You know they will be busy and really won't have time for this old lady for quite a while but I am close enough for them to just whizz on by and bring me a ice cream from the new little ice cream place!! Or just say Hi....Its probably my fault that they left, I visited too much, called too much, spoke my mind too much...all the things that parents and grandparents do just because they want to be near them, to touch them, to hear their voice instead of cold e-mail. We older folks are more of a "hold the picture" generation and its hard to understand. That seeing them for a minute just to know they are ok is important.

they have good jobs now and Logan is in 6th grand and spending time with her gandma will no longer be a fun thing...unless we are shopping and I am all for that!! Now if a good looking older gentleman just dropped out of the sky and fell in my lap, i wouldn't complain but as far as going looking for one..nope, after being along so long my habits are hard to break and even harder to put up with someone elses' habits, so I can make it...if someone will just call every now and then to see if I am dead or not!! So long family.....live fun and love well.

CHANGES IN LIVE

2008-08-07T06:09:00.000-07:00

I know that changes in life occur , sometimes its a surprise, sometimes not. They come often but you never quite get use to it. I have had some changes that had made me happy and then some that completely devasated me. Most are in between. My little family that I have lived across from for the last 5 years is moving. Not far. But still gone from my sight. It has been great being able to look out the window and see them come and go and be sure they are safely in at night when Jill comes home from work late or Lane comes home from work and I see he is ok.

To be able to walk over and say Hi and swim with them and eat with them and hug them.

It will be different and scary for a while. I moved here especially to be near them and it is going to take getting use to. They won't call as often or stop by and that will be hard. I am happy for them that they get a new place to call their own and a new pool to play in and closer to Logans school . She will be on a bus route now. Lane has a good job at the school district and he seems to really like it. I will be glad for them but I still will be sad. It has made my stomach hurt and my sleep not so good, I wake up now, and look out to see if they are still there and I will cry, but I will adjust and get ok. If they will just keep me in their thoughts and a phone call or two and come by and get me every now and then so i can see them in "person", touch them and really look at them and know they are ok...and thats the most important thing...that they are ok. Doors close and doors open and you just have faith and believe that this was suppose to be.

Senior Citizens

2008-07-19T18:49:00.000-07:00

Yep, seniors, or mature or elderly or whatever you call us. We are older and can't go as fast or think as fast or remember things that younger people do. Its a part of aging, getting older, things don't work like they use to. You get tired quicker, stuff you could do, even 5 years ago, takes so much out of you its a day or two to recover. I knew older people, my two aunts , my mother, my uncle. They were still funny, peculiar and annoying sometimes but they were family. Not like people you work with who can become family but real family, ones you could yell at, fuss with, laugh with and cry with. As they aged, I could tell things just didn't work as well as they use to and mistakes were made and laughed at and passed over. Stuff like momma wearing two different shoes to church or Amy setting the smoke detector off when she cooked in the kitchen and putting saran wrap on everything to keep the bugs off. And still , when I was 54 years old, coming in at night when i stayed with her, to cover me up and kiss me and make sure i was sleeping well. She never asked for help but we knew she needed it . So on weekends I would change her beds, wash clothes, sometimes trim her hair and take stuff that she wouldn't have to go to a big store to get like paper towels, toilet paper, shampoo, hair color (yes, even at 83), and little things like a b ook to read or some new fingernail polish. You never know if something is wrong with them because they always think they are suppose to be the strong ones, the ones taking care of you no matter how old you are. We didn't even know she was that sick because it took her not being able to get her breath for us to really almost physically take her to the emergency room. She had a collasped lung, and it was full of fluid. They drained quarts of fluid from her and it had cancer cells in it. Never one to admit defeat, she refused to come stay with me so we had someone come in a help her out. She never wanted to leave her home or her "things". When she got so bad she couldn't get upstairs, we brought a bed downstairs but then she couldn't stand long to get dressed. We took her to the hospital, but when they put an IV in her hand for fluids and wanted to do a bioposy to determine what type of cancer it was, she cried and said , it hurt too much.

So we took her to a beautiful assisted living place where she had a room, tv, some of her own

"things" and she accepted that. She would reach in the air with her hands and look at the ceiling and we asked her why ...and she said there were angels there. So we let her have her angels and soon she was one herself. My mother was stubborn and brave and her back ached so badly she walked with a cane, again, not going to the doctor until the last when they found tumors on her lower spine and did radiation...another one who wanted to come home, even tho she was on the strongest pain meds you could take...she was loopy most of the time and saw cats on the ceiling and on the curtains....but she never stopped smoking...and we sorta knew where her cancer started. So, you never know how well they are. The picture of the 80 year old waterskiing is an exception to the rule. There is one like that for every million who hurt like hell when they wake up in the morning. Thankfully I am still doing ok at 68 and a half. Just ok, I just don't have the energy or the perkiness that I use to have and probably should be looking into a retirement apartment or some place like that with services like some meals or exercist rooms and no yard work ..but they cost ..some at much as 2400.00 a month and down to no less than 1200.00. I just don't have the money , even if they supply all utilities so it will have to wait a while, until the economy gets better, or I win the lottery or I run out of money and can apply for medicaid.

Its not sad, its the facts..how many older people would ride with you somewhere but would rather stay in the car while you shop? Or when you ask them to go somewhere, they would rather you just bring them a "little something to eat back"..even your leftovers help pay for a meal. I still have the energy to shop all day with my grandaughter and son and daughter in law and I love it and I hope nver ever to not be able to do that...going with them to eat out or just ride to wal mart is a bigger thrill than having a boyfriend!! They mean so much to me as do all children to parents...so again, call your grandparents, your parents and aunts and uncles you have living...it means so much to them. Amy was 82. We cooked steaks over the charcoal and made gin and tonics and got tipsy and even washed the neighbors dog one time because he "smelled" he loved it! we woke up the next morning with dog prints on our pajamas!!As long a they lived, I talked with them at least twice a day, sometimes more. If we had had e mail then, we would have sent it back and forth many times. I never not answered the phone when they called, if the machine picked it up, I called back. Because i realized that , no matter what, they needed to know i cared and I needed them.

Part time jobs, volunterring somewhere, hobbies, are not substitute for knowing that family cares. Even if you just call when you are out to see if they need something or when you eat out, call back to see if they want you to bring them something, or go to the store and ask if they are out of anything. Because getting up and getting out and driving to the store or to eat is harder and its not so easy anymore to get in and out of a car or walk somewhere. Most of the time, they would say No, but thanks for asking. And it makes them feel so much better to know, just for that short period of time, they thought of you. It hard being older and elderly, you do need for someone to care for and about you and look out for things that you use to look out for when they needed you. Its really tough now , money is tight everywhere and people have little time or cash to spare but remember this : time is the most important thing you can give someone and it only takes a minute or two to call and ask "how are you doing, do you need anything?". I am a senior now and elderly or whatever they call it and sometimes you are just tired and really need that phone call or a hug. So call your seniors, your grandparents, your mothers and dads and be thankful you can pick up a phone or cell phone or e mail and make that call still.

4th of July!

2008-07-07T06:17:00.001-07:00

We had a great time on the 4th! Warm sun, cold drinks, great friends and a scooter parade. A little shower didn't dampen the spirits or the parade. Cooking out and swimming in the neighbors pool was the perfect way to celebrate.

WE din't have to use any gas to go somewhere or fight the traffic just enjoy., The fireworks later

sent some small kids and a couple dogs to the inside but those of us who went in with them could still see them out the windows and it was a good show even with the little drizzle that was.!

So now the rest of the hot summer except now we are haveing some t-storms and rain and that gives us a show every evening!! not the kind i particularly like! Enjoy the rest of the summer gang!

MOVIES

2008-06-30T12:27:00.001-07:00

I love movies. When the gas cost so much and you have to do things close to home, theres nothing better than hunkering down in the house and watching a movie. Lifetime and LMN have some good ones, even in the daytime. And i don't mind fixing myself a big on pepsi and crunching on a box of milk duds or chocolate covered rasins.

Hey, movies played a huge part of my growing up. It was a special treat, not induldged in often and cost only 50 cents to get in. When i was oh, about 7 or so, there were the cowboy movies and the Sat. serials that we watched in the Movie house in West End in Atlanta. My mom would take several of us and pick us up. We thought she left us but i found out much later that she always stayed and sat in the back row keeping an eye on us. I went with her a lot too...i remember one fated time when she took me to see Bambi and I cried so much she had to take me home.!! hey, bambi's mom got killed , you had to cry. Oh, most of those , except Bambi , were in black and white. Then as i got older, i went with girlfriends and Mom still pulled the old "I'll be waitin out front when its over" We were so dumb, we just thought she was really good at being there right as the movie got out! Then about 14 or 15, we got to go on the bus to the movies and be on our own. They had ushers back then and they kept an eye on the younger girls and so did the boys from our grammar school, throwing popcorn and making farting noises with their armpits. Hey, it was allllll innocent back then. Truly and safe too. We got to go on one bus, then changed to a trolley for the big movies that were at the Lowes and the Fox Theatre in downtown Atlanta...still safe then..and that was the most special treat. The Fox had a huge lobby and great big doors with gilded paint on them, inside you had balconies and velvet uphostery and a huge stage before the screen, velvet drapes, trimmed in gold shash, the ceiling had built in stars that lit up when the lights were out and the drapes pulled apart for the movie. The stage had a door in it that a great huge organ would rise up and play during intermission on special occasions. Man, that was something else. Later when I was 15 or so, I went to see Elvis at the Fox and the Lowes too. WE got introuduced to drive ins as soon as one of us dated someone who could drive or one of us could drive! We did, in fact, put people in the trunk and sneak them in. Hey, a 57 chevy bel air had a huge trunk! We double dated, made out in the front and back seats and ate like little pigs in intermission and that went on until our 20's. So much fun, so innocent. So i still like movies and watch them a lot on tv. Its better than most stuff on tv and actually cheaper than the ol 50 cent. I like being in my little house and safe and confortable and watch a good movie. I can get up when I want and come back. I don't have digital tv so i can't pause or start over but heck, they come back anyways.

Its hot now and a good time to stay in a watch, the formal attair for summer in sc is a new bathing suit and make up is lipgloss with sunscreen...nothing else stays on, it melts! So enjoy, its almost the 4th of July and some great stuff is on tv!

Fun in d 'hood

2008-06-03T16:03:00.000-07:00

We had such a fun memorial day on that monday. Mandy, Jill , sent out fliers and invited all the neighbors and some across the street and just about all came and brought food and water guns and little kiddie pools and we had a good time, talking laughing and just hanging out. Watching the kids swim and play. Lane cooked all the food and we had some gooooood burgers and hotdogs.

It was so nice to be with such good people and all my family. Love em to death! Lane had his dj set up and we had the best music all day long! How simple and easy a fun day ..with the price of gas, we might be doing more of that..wonder if you can cook Ramin noodles...hehehe......

2008-05-26T05:34:00.000-07:00

Its feeling like summer now, the days are getting hotter. We had to repair some of my deck or I would have wound up on the ground at some point. Lane did all the work and he is really good at building and cutting and fixing stuff. He is a very talented son and has a talent for "hands on projects" I know he hates doing stuff like that but he is sooo good at it. I do appreciate him fixing it for me. The cats are all about all the time and i am finding various bird parts they have not eaten after catching the little stupid birds. Hey, we have many bells on all of them but the birds just keep on getting caught! Some lizards too and a couple moles....they can catch all the moles they want to, i wish they would catch them all! Kids are wanting to swim all day , the water is still a little cool for me yet....but they can turn blue and shiver all they want. Enjoy the days , the nights and all your family and friends....eat much fried chicken and burgers and hot dogs, this time of year passes quickly!

Older n hell!

2008-04-21T10:49:00.001-07:00

Oh gosh, I just turned 68 and I looked in the mirror and what did I see??? An old lady lookin back at me! I just don't look good nekkid anymore! Say, when did all that happen. Just glad to be here and around and upright and able to do all the stuff I like to do...so happy Spring everyone and feel blessed to have friends and family and pets and stuff to talk about and people to wave at! My little but special family made dinner for my birthday, some of my favorite cheeken on the grill and cupcakes and they gave me some really great gifts! A picture book...you know how old people still like to hold things in their hands to look at...a family charm made by my special Jilll and a little carry bag made by my adorable Logan....and a garden gnome that we hope is heavy enough not to steal!! thanks, Lane , Jill and Loggy.... My buddie, Mandi, gave me a card with a really HOT guy on it...hey, its ok, I can still see good! and a cute coffee mug..that she wanted..

lolol! Thank you, thank you all!

Hooray Spring

2008-03-31T10:31:00.001-07:00

The trees are finally getting pretty and the pollen isn't so pretty! But it feels good and the days are a little longer and we get to stay outside more.

Except today which is cool, really dreary and cloudy. Its "blackberry winter" as my grand use to call it. It turns cool when the blackberry bushes bloom. Look around, you can really see the white blooms all around on the fences and in the thickets. All is good and everyone seems to be doing well. Don't talk to people much unless we are outside. I work in yard, read a lot, watch movies on tv..I love tv really, I do...someday i want a big hdtv or small one..might even put the darn thing in the bedroom and watch tv from there! Sweet! Fell and hurt my ankle a couple weeks ago and it still hurts real bad when i walk a lot on it. I think some small bones in the foot were broken , it will just take time to get better but its weak and I have to be careful on it. That sucks! Still walk every day with my son's dog and we go and mile and a half. She wants all the little squrells,squrrels, or whatever and stops dead in her tracks, ears up, being so still and quiet and she

really points at them. We saw a dead one today but i didn't scoop it for her!! could have been a crock pot supper! Might have to start that, can't go anywhere or buy groceries everything is so high. Love being with my grandaughter but her time is short, she has so many friends and people to do stuff with. I just appreciate the time I do have with her. We talk a lot and look at pictures and play. We both got all bent out of shape on Easter Sunday . She had to sit at the kids table and it hurt her feelings and mine. She was already pissed because some of the neighbor kids had been in her room and messed it up when she wasn't there. She likes her space and has a plan in place for taking kids up there and letting them play with certain stuff that she lets them choose. I guess we have to be mindful now that she is a pre teen and her "space" is hers . Its just going to get worse the older she gets. I still remember when she was about 6 and loved everything you bought her. Man, its not like that now! Best just give her money. The food was great, Jill and Lane did the cooking and it always turns out to be the best home cooked meal that I have had in a long time. I really enjoy eating with them and being with them, I wish I had the money to take them out more.

I need to think about getting a cell phone. I don't have one but now that i have a hurt foot, I think about taking one when I walk or even have one out in the yard or if I go to the park. for safety sense.

Looking at that Jitterbug, but its not a camera and has no choices in ringtones or such, I don't need much on one, just a camera, a choice of ringtones, don't need internet or music or such, so I will have to look around and think real hard how to get one thats cheap! Maybe a pre pay? I just don't know. Too old, too stupid. Oh well, maybe my family can put up with me a couple years more..just think, this april, I will be close..real close..to 70!!!

Warmer and warmer and then a freeze Ha

2008-02-09T14:09:00.000-08:00

It was a few warmer days and finally I got a new roof...ugh, expensive but probably worth it. I would have to do something when i got ready to sell anyhow and at least now I won't hear any drip, drip during the rain storms...they did it in two days and were really nice and efficient..they should be for the cost! Don't want to get too use to warm days . We got fooled last year and a late freeze burned a lot of the foliage and my fig tree, apple tree and lots of flowers so we will not buy any plants just yet. My grandaughter is taking guitar and she so far likes it a lot. We , my daughter in law, Jill, Logan and I went shopping for her some clothes and we had such a great time. She was in a good mood, we got to see all the Mall had to offer, we laughed, tried on clothes and just enjoyed our few hours together as girls. It means so much to me to be included in their

outings and it just reinforces how blessed I truly am. And it won't be long before our 11 year old would rather go with her friends than us, or walk at least 50 paces in front of us..so, Enjoy the early warm days, your family and your buddies...

Cold weather Our Style

2008-01-27T08:10:00.001-08:00

Well, it was pretty, didn't last long and if you were asleep, you missed it! I would rather have it that way than the ice storm we have had in the past.

There were big flakes and you could actuall

make a snowball ...if you were up at 11:00!

So we finally had and have our cold weather and I dread the electric bill. My little house needs a new roof because I can hear it dripping in the attic when it rains...darn, so I am accepting donations..haha. Just charge it baby! and pay the mininum each month!! Charge now, pay later..much later....Jan is a strange month. When I had my store, it was a time to get straightened up, clean up, have sales and get ready for Feb.

Because around here, Feb. starts the spring season and you start looking for shorts and bathing suits....I see my little jonquils peeking up already.. hope theres not a late freeze like last year, it froze my little apple tree and my fig tree right to pieces! Enjoy tv , movies and keeping warm inside, before long all our days will be spent outside!!! yea

Thankful for Small Things

2007-12-21T12:22:00.000-08:00

This Christmas I find myself more thankful for the small things in life. That happens a lot when you find yourself "short on cash" but its fun shopping at the Dollar Store!!! My oldest grandaughter is getting married this December and I hope we can make it . The youngest will be 11 in Feb. and shes waayyy too cool for me.

My son and his wife and those two are my small family and The ones I love most in my heart. Its great having them close and being able to be with them and feeling welcome in their home and hearts. Shawna is the one getting married , pictured above with her cat, and she is just so pretty. WE don't live close to her and only get to see her once or twice a year. Happiness to her.

All of them are amazing and I wouldn't have a blog if it weren't for them and I wouldn't feel right putting this up for this time of year without mentioning family, friends, neighbors all those you are there for and all who are there for you , I wish for them so much happiness and joy. So , Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.

Hey Merry Christmas

2007-12-04T11:33:00.000-08:00

I love love Christmas. Its got its own spirit and its own way of making people smile at you and talk to you and be nicer than at other times. The real meaning sure gets lost sometimes in the busy shopping days but you know its never far from your thoughts. There are miracles and things that happen for no reason or for some reason. Some doors get closed on your life while others get opened so you can go forward in another direction. I miss so much the people who are not with us anymore. My mom, my Dad, my Aunts and Uncles and husbands. We use to have a full house and tummys when we would go to my Aunts and before that my Moms. My little family is small now and I am so thankful for them and for the way they make me feel special at Christmas and all the time. When I worked for myself in my business I could hardly make time for anything. The week ends I worked so employees could be off, early mornings and late hours were normal and i got to where i hated the Christmas season. People were irritable, mean and demanding and the hours so long i use to fall exausted in sleep on the sofa as soon as I got home. I would rush to get to my Aunts on Christmas Eve, all loaded up with gifts for everyone and excited to finally be out of the store and able to see her and my son and his family. It made all the hard work worthwhile because i was able to buy them the presents and gifts that I really wanted them to have. We would have a big evening dinner, open the gifts because they would have to leave for Santa the next morning.

Then, my aunt and i would consume some wine and fall asleep , sometimes both of us would sneak pesents under the tree for each other we had hidden till Christmas morning. She was 84 and still thought of me as her "baby". I hated to leave early that day, but the awful day afterChristmas at the busines...the exchange day...would dawn early...there were no normal holidays in retail. All it did was drain you and leave you nothing more to give.

The holidays were another day to be open so other people could shop. Many a time we celebrated the 4 th of July at the store with "take out" bar b que. from 1976 to 2003 ...my time was not mine. It was so wonderful to retire and be involved with the holidays with family, neighbors and other friends....watch football, celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas and the 4th and Easter with each other..finally, a time to just be. I still miss the ones not here..so badly sometimes I wish I could re-create the past. But we can't and this day is the one to be thankful for and Celebrate the miracles, even the little ones that Christmas and all its meanings bring.

Thanks to my little family for letting me have the time with them that they do because i do know what "have so little time" means. Thanks to my neighbors for taking care of me too and for letting me be part of their lives and mostly for letting me love everyone and share the joys and the small miracles that happen each day.

Time Goes Fast

2007-11-07T06:12:00.001-08:00

Aha, its finally cooler ..and really nice.

But, its also darker in the evening and I miss getting outside with all the neighbors and just talking for a while before going in to chill before bedtime. Its already dark when my loved ones and very special neighbors come home and somehow it seems like bedtime comes too early. I like the daylight early but honestly, I don't see where is saves you energy since you turn on more light in the early evening than you do in the morning. Its been a fun football season so far and my gosh, Thanksgiving is only a few weeks away and then its Christmas and another year...really went fast. Hope you have time to get out and enjoy the weather, even if it is sooo dry, it is truly beautiful with the skies so blue and the trees turning color . Time of the year to hunt up some firewood and find all the sweat tops you put away last Spring..we still have some shorts weather , I remember several Thanksgivings that we had on shorts and ran the air conditioning so we could cook the turkey in the hot kitchen! We had a great Halloween party in the circle and the kids looked so cute..even the monster ones! Good food, friends and fun for all. Looking forward to our Christmas party in the circle...Happy Fall ya'll.

Almost cooler!

2007-09-12T08:11:00.000-07:00

It won't be long before the nights are cooler and the days shorter and maybe we can stop sweating. These days are good in the morning, for walking, working in the yard. The outdoors gives you a sense of peace and contentment and time to meditate or daydream. Its good for the soul, just like cats, dogs and horses. The smell of grass, trees , dirt, fires in the fireplace, reminding me of how very blessed and lucky we are to be here in this time and this place. Everywhere I go and stand or wait or be in a place where there are people..I hear a lot about politics and the people running for office. Mostly what I hear is the discontent about not having someone running that is close to the real people. The working crowd, the retired people, the middle american that is finding things so hard to achieve anymore. I hear that we need a third party and someone that remembers their roots and where they came from, working class or affluent, just someone to be their champion. The politicians stay in office too long, get corrupted and forget. People are saying their health care cost too much, even if you save in a 401K, IrA or savings or put money away in mutual funds, you can't make it because things not even realted to this country are having such an effect on our own stock market and thats what those funds are invested in.

There is way too much money being raised by the candidates and no revealing where that money came from. If it came from big business or foreign business or someplace unknown, that candidate will have favors to pay back. There is wayy too much pushing our senate, congress and executive office in the US that is from abroad. So , mostly, like me people are wating to see who comes out with the platform that most makes sense to them. We may have a long wait.

CLOTHES?

2007-08-30T08:44:00.000-07:00

Its finally getting cooler but its been so hot its like wearing clothes actually hurts! Sweat drips down your head, off your nose and your underwear is so soaked, you can't stand it. We go from one air conditioned spot to another except when we are out in the yard or out in the neighborhood. Lordy, how did our mothers and grandparents stand it without air??Well, they worked early in the morning, ate a good dinner and then..we were forced to take a nap. My grandmother would pull the shades, crank up the little black rotary fans, give us a damp washrag, change into her slip..yes, she wore a slip and a dern corset every day of her life. So there we all were, in 1949, sweating and laying on the beds, trying to be quiet. Good grief, that quiet time lasted for about 3 hours. It was so hard for me, at 9, to be still and quiet, the outside calling me, the hunting dogs wiggling around under the house(it sat on tall brick pillows) and me wanting to go and crawl under there with them and play! Along with the DDT my Uncle put under there and on them for fleas!..
That was actually the only time we could sit outside at night and not have any mosquitoes and gnats..when they sprayed the cotton fields with DDT...hey, it worked!! But the time finally passed and all of us got up, dressed, spashed water on our faces and , if it was Sunday, we visited.
Geez, I was forced to go and visit (wearing a dress with a pinafore over it) , to see all the cousins, aunts, uncles, that were all over the county, having just gotten up from their naps and dressed and were waiting for company. We had tea, sometimes a soda and homemade cake or cookes mostly all the places...finally we could get home and ..undress...and I was freed to go outside and harrass the chickens, pet the mule, run from the new calf, play with the dogs!! until leftovers for supper and then at dark, back to the very warm bedroom, another washcloth, a paper fan and try to sleep! mosquitoes love it when there is not air conditioning. But the dressing part was ingrained in my Mother and Aunts forever. When they retired and moved in together in 1970 in Springfield...they spent the morning getting dressed to go down town to the post office to get the mail..because everyone was there getting their mail! And again every afternoon after nap time, dressed to recieve company..in cast someone came..and someone always did..and they were dressed too..it was polite and expected and we have come a long way Baby ..now dressing is a clean pair of shorts, a tank top without food on the front and flipflops with no bite marks from dogs in them!! My Aunt Amy dressed until she couldn't...even at 80, driving her great big ol Chrysler to come to Columbia to see me..she dressed and had her hair fixed..a girdle, heels and her bouffant hair..I always asked her why she spent so much time doing that and she always said, "I couldn't come to town just any old way and I want your friends and people at work to see me looking nice" made me feel like a slump...still feel like a slump...just put on clothes to go outside and wish I had that sense of pride and Lord knows, wish I had a post office to go to.
I feel bad I know my family could be a lot prouder of me if I looked nicer and put on some make up and fixed my hair but darn, its a lot of trouble and its tooooo hot!~

RESPECT

2007-08-09T13:13:00.000-07:00

There are many ways to show respect to another. It has to do with respecting their things, their feelings, their ways and them. Strong women are good at respect.

They can take over a situation, bad or good, and help without pushing the button of the person being helped.

We have ruined our men. I don't think the womens lib thing did it. I think we have become such strong women that they think we CAN do it all and when we ask for some help with a situation, they resent it. If only they were to know the truth. We stong women get tired..we get tired of "handling" everything all the time. The house, the bills, the car, the yard, the kids, the jobs, the meals, everything. Your moms and grandmoms did it all the time but the men then were at war, out in the fields, were the only ones working every day and they were really tired and needed a strong woman at home. Men can do everything too, they just need to know that its the little things that they do that count a lot toward being loved back. It does not matter if you are the greatest lover in the world, if you can not respect your woman and your family. Let me tell you, when a woman looses respect for a man, they might still care for them but it's a far cry from the love she had. Sometimes showing your strong woman you care isn't grabbing her ass as she walks by or her boobs as she works on something on the computer. Its taking care of some bills, washing clothes, keeping the yard neat, doing a little more than asked. That gets you more loving than any "grab" can. Strong women need more support than the other, they carry a larger burden and reach that breaking point too.

The "yes Honey" woman doesn't speak for herself she has become whatever the man wants her to be and whatever he does is fine and that might work for some but not for those of us

that are "Women Who Run With The Wolves"...

SAVE THOSE MEMORIES!

2007-08-01T13:51:00.000-07:00

You know how crazy your new man gets when he finds some of your crap from the earlier boyfriends? Well, no matter how he whines, begs, threatens, don't you go and throw it away just to please him. You will regret it and wish you had it back later. I know. I did just that probably about 4 times and I wish like hell I had them back. My first husband found my diaries and pictures from high school and pitched such a fit, I got mad and moved all my stuff back home. Until my mama made me move right back..that same night! Well, I relented and destroyed it in front of him...stupid, stupid, I should have just hid it all. Well, the second husband got mad when he saw all the pictures and crap from the first one and DEMANDED that I throw it away that same day. Hell, i knew better than to pack and go back to mama....there wasn't room by then and she would have made me come back anyway. Nooooooo don't do it. You will wish you had those famous pictures of school, football games, college parties, vacations in a druken fog and all the blackmail you took and was taken of you! Hide the school annuals and all letters and cards, bury them, put in a lock box but don't throw it away!!! Someday you will be alone and you just might want to bring it all back...

back....All the proms, like the one I had 2 dates for and had to break one..he got mad and broke his hand on his car hood! haha. The nights you parked in a car and made out...it was sooo hard in a prom dress and crinolin petticoats...and besides, sometimes the cops would come and knock on your window and tell you to go home..That was when it was safe to park. And the graduation pictures under the flower arch when your date switched your high school ring on your finger and you kissed (nope, no pic of that either) but I gave him a kiss the chaperones were heading for the fire extingushiers....oops spell ck...and all the guys in between, at beach parties or lake parties where pj was plentiful and you could throw up in the water..Hey, we moms and little ol grey haired grannies HAD A LIFE..and some of us had speicy spicey ones...Damn, the week before I married Lanes daddy, one ex boyfriend showed up at my shower and had to be escorted off the premisis by my friends DAD..i looked so cute as a toilet paper bride that night. another one called me long distanct to tell me he really did love me even tho he was in a rock band and was going pot and had groupies. And the boy next door said he always thought he would marry me because i was the only girl strong enough to put up with him......so hey, under that little ol wrinkled grey head.......lies..................MEMORIES, don't throw them away, ok?

ALREADY TIRED OF SUMMER

2007-07-31T04:53:00.000-07:00

It didn't take long to get tired of summer. Here in SC, June is fine, but by the time you get to July, it is miserable outside and even August can be a sweaty , hot month. The bugs get bad, the no-see-ums bite the heck out of your legs and the gnats drive you crazy, hummin in your ears, not to mention the mosquitos! You get bites in places you can't scratch in public and at night you try to keep your ankles from itching so bad you finally reach down and rip them apart , to relieve the itch! All the flowers are heat stressed and the little darlin' squrrels are throwing out the flowers and spending time in the cooler soil of the hanging baskets! aaaaa for just a few cooler days, when the air cond. doesn't have to run full tilt and makes you dread the SCEG bill!! Being a person who loves to be outside, its tough finding a time of day to get in a walk or a little bike ride without sweating so much it drips off your nose. Looks like the pool is the cool way to exercise!! Stay cool little buddies!!

SPOILED KID?

2007-07-26T15:42:00.000-07:00

Since i was the only child of a group of 7, my mom being the only one productive and that was after 13 years of marriage....hummm....you would have thought...oh great, another spoiled little rotten kid. But as a fact, i was so not spoiled. I got new clothes twice a year..in fall and in spring, two pair of shoes..shool shoes and summer sandals and we kept them up with polish and new soles too. When i was little and they tried their best to put me in cute little dresses, i usualy wound up outside in a mud pile or under or up in a tree. I climbed trees until i was 13 or 14. My mom use to worry because i didn't like boys yet............believe me, that changed later. I learned how to fish , clean up a car, cut grass, clean out a basement or a garage, polish shoes, from my DAD.

My mom wouldn't let me near the kitchen. That was her domain. It was a good thing too because when my DAd had a heart attack when i was 13, mom and I did everything and we did without a lot too. It took him out when i was 17, and I don't remember my Mom ever hiring a handyman to do anything. Neighbors helped out when you needed one. When i was 3 or so, my Dad asked some of his commanding officers to have a real southern cooked dinner. My mom had some help and they cooked up fried chicken, rice, gravy, green beans, squash, apple pie and some great biscuits. About half way during the dinner, i slipped down under the table(remember all these army officers were sitting around that table) and stayed and stayed. My mom finally asked me what i was doing under there? So, i answered" I'm trying to get my biscuit." " Well, hurry up" my mom said. " I can't hurry, this mans got his foot on it"! I so

loudly replied! I bet i got my biscuit right quick after that. We had pet dogs, pet cats, a couple rabbits and a big ol box turtle in our lives and a duck. that duck i got for easter and he grew up to be a big duck. I loved that duck ...he was Donald. I carried the duck by his neck and because i was so small and he grew and grew, he had a bent place in his neck where i had carried him all the time. he was a guard duck and he use to run around front of the house, quacking and nipping at all the strangers that came in the yard...well, he had to go to my Nanas house in the country for doing that and then he intimidated the chickens and the other ducks (after all he thought he was human) so much they took him further way out in the country to a man that had geese and ducks and a big pond for him to play in and defend. I didn't want him to go but he had to. So, I had the important things in my life, I always had love and family and everything i needed and not everything i wanted. I remember crying and crying when my best friend in high school got a brand new 57 Chevy convertiable and I couldn't have a car. That was one of the last real talks my Dad and i every had. He came and held me and told me how, it was not because they couldn't afford to get me a car, it was because i didn't need a car. That when the time came, and I needed one to get back and forth to college, then we would talk about it but they loved me and they knew what I needed and the difference in stuff i just wanted. Don't you wish kids today, understood the difference.???

LIFE LESSON

2007-07-19T17:21:00.000-07:00

My first husband and also my second husband and i were in a small family business together. A little clothing store called Bums Factory Outlet here in Columbia. We had it for almost 30 years.

I had some crazy wonderful employees at that store . From the college kids, earning their 200 hours in retail business, to my wonderful seamstresses who make all the clothes fit to wear.

All of them characters..some excellent and some really out there...like the guy from Mt. Pleasant who dressed in a ladies bathing suit and posed in the window of the store one night to the beautiful young lady who had an abortion one week end and still showed up for work on Monday. To the dedicated ladies in the back, me almost being the oldest, they all became family, an extended family that I would have done anything for and they would have me also. On birthdays and special days, we had cakes, ice cream, KFC dinners and presents for all. At Thanksgiving we gave out Turkeys and Christmas hams and bonus and gifts. Because some of them had a hard life. One friend was a single mom who had raised her daughter all by herself and worked 2 jobs to make ends meet. Another had 10 children and worked beside her husband in a ditch digging business until he died and she still stayed up nights and sewed clothes for her kids to wear to school so they would have something new. And she never missed a day of work. She retired from the store and she had seen the deaths of 3 of her grown children. We laughed, fussed and cried together and each Mothers Day they all got a special flower and little gift. I did this, not because I had to, not because anyone expected it BUT because i wanted to, I wanted to for the simple reason that everyone , at some time in their life, no matter how young or how old just needs, REALLY NEEDS, to feel special. And everyone is in their own unique way, is special.

For Southern women and families, that is a way of life you have grown up with. Your friends and family are there to make you feel special. You are all up in everyones life and happenings and things bad and good. You go in a out of each others houses and no one cares. If there is a bed to be changed, clothes to be washed, food to be cooked or a kid to be looked after , watched or fussed at, you just do it. And you do it because you want to, not because you have to but you really and truly don't mind doing it and it gives you a good feeling to do it. So you young people out there who have grandparents or parents who come to you and ask to help, let them. it makes them feel good and makes them feel needed and most of all makes them feel special but mainly its because they love you. And someday, sooner or later, they will have to call on you to do for them. So don't fuss when they wash a pot, or take out the garbage, just be thankful they are around for now and healthy enough to do it.

Lord, I wish the days of leaving doors open, and keys under the mat were still here. When you could walk in your house and see a basket of vegetables and know who brought it. One time, when I lived in the country, someone came and left a great pot of wonderful catfish stew on my stove, all warm and ready to eat. Just know that to me, you all are special.

A HORSE IS A HORSE, RIGHT?

2007-07-18T13:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, so the first critter i had to ride, wasn't ahorse at all but a goat! It fit me right good at the time.

However, that darn goat got me good, he came up and took my moon pie, wrapper and all out of my hand and ate it! Then I graduated to a pony. I have loved horses since and had some really great ones. i never minded cleaning, washing, picking out their feet, feeding them and the way they smell is great! Plus their noses and faces are so soft and gentle. Its true the outside of a horse is great for the inside of a person.

SMALL FAMILY

2007-07-17T11:48:00.000-07:00

These are the most important peeps in my whole life. My son,

my grandaughter, my daughter in law and my older grandaughter.

Aren't they just beautiful!!!

WHY ALONE

2007-07-16T17:17:00.000-07:00

I am always asked why I don't search for a man to spend my time with. I figure if one is in the future for me, he will find me. I am alone, not lonely.
I read a lot and love watching TV movies and specials and seeing the Travel Channel of places I would love to see. I have out lived two husbands.
The first one left me early in life and I was not so prepared for that. It scared me and it made it hard for me and my little boy. The second one, who I thought was soooooooooooooperfect (ha)
decided he liked a 20 year old better than a 45 year old who was starting menopause. Grrrrrr
That MADE me crazy mad. I was a nut case for about a year and then realized it was the best thing he did for me. I became myself for the first time since college. I could fly without carrying another on my back. I took art, photography, did trips to places a man hates to go (Disney World!)
wore micky mouse ears and acted like a fool.
We never seperated the business we had built up. It was a small family clothing store and we did not want the Lawyers to wind up with everything. Sooooooooooo we kept working together...
Oh yes, it was like walking through hell each and every day. But we did and we had a successful business that did super some years and fell to to bottom some years...those 7 day a week, 12 hour took its toll. I never got to see my son, his varous wives and kids and holidays were short because a retail store is open all the time. It wore me out. But in 2001, he was diagnosed with stage IV prostate cancer that had gone to his bones. I asked him to come home because i knew that the chemo, radiation and reduction of his male hormones were going to mess him up bad.
It did, we had an agonizing 2 years of treatment and without the wonderful help from his son and his first wife and some from my son, we would have failed but they were there and we were backup for each other. It took a whole lifetime out of his sons life, he was so dedicated to his dad and to the store where he worked . Without his help , it would have been impossible. Some days he would look at me as i was putting on his socks after bathing and changing the catather bag for him, and he would say that i was just like Jesus, washing the disiples (?) feet at the last supper. With tears in my eyes, I would reply that i was not, that I was more like The prostitute mary who washed Jesus' feet with her hair. He lasted 2 years. So Ladies get your men to take the psa test..earlier than then recommend...please. I would do it all over again, I felt honored to be able to care for him. It really takes a toll on your faith tho; I questioned God every day and got mad with Him too.
It took me a while to realize he gave me the strength I needed to get through this part of my life, that he always had given me strength that I never knew I had.

REAL SIMPLE LIFE

2007-07-16T06:55:00.000-07:00

Thats my mom and me at the beach. When i was about 12 or so. We had such great times with so little to play with.

when i was smaller, i would spend time pushing little cars around in the dirt, playing with a box of toothpicks and some maypops and making them into people, bathtubs, animals, etc...(look for those maypop pods in the edges of fields and we got mine along the railroad tracks in front of my grandmothers house), I had cornsilk dolls..corn pulled out of the field, the silks were the hair and we drew faces on them.

they had different hair (silks) some red, some yellow, some brown..when they got dried up, we fed them to the hogs.

We had a "burn Pile" at the edge of the yard and anything broken got thrown on it, so I had chipped dishes, some spoons, some cups and that was a real treasure to play with.

Under the Windmill, when it over flowed, there was a great puddle to play in the sand in. I played for hours in the back yard, climbing trees, building stuff and my first sand pile wasn't a sand pile at all but a pile of gravel my Dad had ordered to make a french drain with! We loved the water and the beach and each summer we spent time there with my aunts and uncles and sometimes my grandmother (when I was little)

I remember one time when I was bout 13 getting blistered so bad, my momma put cloths drenched in vinegar all over me! I still think about that when I smell deviled eggs or easter egg dye! Pickled, I was. Got caught in sandspurs, running after my mom and my Dad had to

carry me back to the beachcottage and pull them out of both my feet. I must have been a pain!

Had no tv until the late 50's so listened to radio and played outside all the time. I can remember being glad school was out so I could go barefoot. Walked all over the place, feeling safe and secure because somebody somewhere in the neighborhoods were watching out after all the kids.

We kids use to get in the woods, find snakes, walk for miles, play cowboy and indian, cops and robbers and things like hide and seek, sling statue, red rover, hunt fireflies, free for all, and other made up stuff. One time , I was always the indian maid because ther were about 6 boys and me playing, they tied me up with a vine to a tree....and it was a poison ivy vine!!! WELL, my mom was mad and i had to stay out of school for a week, with calamine lotion all over me and wearing gloves so i wouldn"t scratch myself to death! Learned to leave the little vines alone and just to swing on the grape ones! Isn't is a shame, we can't be that free and safe now?

CHANGING TIMES

2007-07-14T08:21:00.000-07:00

Ok, its been a wierd road since the 40's. I grew up in the South, in a segregated world, with no tv, one phone,

no car at 16, during WW11 and the Korean War. I think those of us who have done that have come a long way

baby! Right after i was born, my Dad went to the war as did all my uncles. My mom and I (baby) travelled back and forth to my grandmas house and the Aunts did too.

To help her with the crops and the house since all the men were gone and she only had one son living at home and he was at war too. She even took in borders to help pay for stuff. We had a radio, listened to soaps and news at day, I grew up about 6 or so, listening to Hoppalong Cassidy, The long Ranger, Sky King and The Shadow.

We had one phone and at my grandmas the phone was a crank one, you could crank it, talk to someone in town and ask where someone was and they could tell you right away...I could call and ask where my mom was, and she would dial where she was for me. Sweet! But, we did have an outhouse, one bath and had to tote hot water to wash in, and one bathroom cabinet that didn't have much medicine in it. I bet we had : one large bottle of asprin, alcohol, peroxide,

idodine, bandaids, gauze, paregoric, ipecac, baking soda and thats it. Everything thing else my grandma made up from stuff in the yard or kitchen. We ate cheap, grits and sliced tomatoes for supper lots of times, and only bought maybe bread and sugar..we had chickens(my gran could wring a chickens neck and have it on the table for lunch in a flash!) eggs, hogs, cow(milk), and vegatables we grew...oh, the ice man came with a block of ice for the icebox and sometimes we had a man with watermelons, cantalope and peaches come by in a mule drawn wagon. It was

soooo simple and so just family. So now here I am addicted to movies on tv, using a computer, have friends that are different races, genders and gay. Yep, we have come a long way but some of it, I wish we still had.

I GOT IT!

2007-07-13T09:50:00.000-07:00

Phew, that took a while for me...made me

think..but now that i have a pic of me...

I can add some of some prettier people.

I'm HOT!

2007-07-13T05:09:00.000-07:00

And not in the really cute sense! The older i get the more I can't stand the heat...man, do I
sweat....literally to the Oldies! I have a really great family.........small...but sooo great. i have a
wonderful , strong son who looks after me and the rest of us. And a daughter in law who is a
caring, strong, beautiful young lady. I feel so blessed. And some cool grandkids..well, one is older but she is still sooo cool and really beautiful. And the young one is a tween..and sometimes a handful but they are my heart. Family is so important and no matter how much you disagree or fight..you have to hold them close..there is not wrong or right , there is just different.
Different ways of doing stuff, thinking stuff and life is too short to let anything get in the way of making up and staying close. Morbid, huh? Well, when you wake up each morning, reading the obits in the paper and you see people....it kinda gives you a reality check. When I owned my store for 30 years, a small clothing store, I had extended family there and loved them too..we had some funny, fierce disagreements but in the end, we always had the store birthday party for each one. Now I am retired and diservadely so...and my extended family is the neighborhood.
I count on them to keep me sane and make sure i wake up each day on the right side of the grass. And my son lives across the street so I can really annoy him.....I think he thinks I am ready for the "put out to pasture" bit already! Later...

Here I am

2007-07-12T05:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, this is new to the ol' lady here and I can only hope to get part of it right! Now I have to tell you that my grandaughter, who is older now, had the misfortune to name me Gome. She use to call me Granmagranma, but somehow when she first started printing, it came out Gome..so it
stuck. I have lived a few years, shed many tears, had some ups and downs and came out ok.
I think. Maybe a little crazy, but shucks, thats par for the course for a senior and after all, we
get use to our families thinking we are a little crazy, it works for us! So......lets try this for now and I can see how to add to this in a while...thanks for visiting. Come back again, ya'll.